One of Murphy’s famous axioms says, “Friends come and go, but enemies accumulate.”

Isn’t it curious how true this quip is?  Of course, some of us never acquire enemies, but we never acquire much in the way of friends either.  You know, “If you stand for nothing you’ll fall for anything.”  If you never stand up (or stand out), then no one will every dislike you…well, except for those who dislike people who don’t take stands.  But, no one will really like you either because they don’t notice you. You get the point.

Today my 3-at-home-sons were looking at the Bible on this topic.  “How do we get peace with our enemies?”  Naturally, we first concluded that we do see enemies in our lives from time to time, and that the Bible seems to have this assumption as well.  Remember Romans:

“If possible, so far as it depends on you, live peaceably with all. Beloved, never avenge yourselves, but leave it to the wrath of God, for it is written, “Vengeance is mine, I will repay, says the Lord.” To the contrary, “if your enemy is hungry, feed him; if he is thirsty, give him something to drink; for by so doing you will heap burning coals on his head.” Do not be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with good.” (Romans 12:18-21, ESV)

Notice it doesn’t say, “If you have enemies…”  Frankly, I hate having enemies and I hate being one.  I deeply appreciate the kind words John Piper’s assistant pastor wrote me concerning my recent book Back to Faith (where I challenge some of Piper’s assumptions on faith and works).  He acknowledge my efforts to be gracious and supportive…even though I disagree with Piper.  That’s always my hope.

Now, with the boys, we pondered things like the Golden Rule and the value of following Matthew 18 in seeking to actually talk to others in order to be reconciled.  We talked of kindness and pursuing peace.  We talked of not speaking ill of others to others (a sure way to grow your enemies).  We even talked about how beating them or yielding to them so as to end the conflict.  Yet, here is where we landed:

“When a man’s ways please the Lord, he makes even his enemies to be at peace with him.” (Proverbs 16:7, ESV)

At that moment, it became clear that one great way is to let the Lord make the peace (we concluded it isn’t the person making his own peace, but the gracious act of God causing peace to happen).  So, please the Lord.  Walk with Him.  Stay tight with the Lord and He can sort out things with enemies.  We know a proverb is a principle and not a promise—but it is a nice principle to have on your side!

So, how do you please the Lord?

I think it is simply to do what He’s asking…next.  I believe Oswald Chambers suggested, “Trust God and do the next thing.”  Really sound advice.  We often try our best to tell God what should please Him (we do this with our enemies too), but He isn’t interested.  God isn’t concerned about EVERY issue in your life at EVERY moment.  He gets it, but He is at work on something.

It seems clear that if you’ll just ask Him what He wants next…He’ll tell you and give you the power to pull it off.  It couldn’t be clearer.  Of course, if you don’t know of anything, maybe there isn’t anything.  But just in case, pray with David:

“Search me, O God, and know my heart! Try me and know my thoughts! And see if there be any grievous way in me, and lead me in the way everlasting!” (Psalm 139:23-24, ESV)

If you want peace with your enemies…I don’t know a faster way.  My experience bears this out as well.

God bless,

Fred Lybrand